When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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