He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
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