yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
