I'm really into asian looking animals
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize