for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
