New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
