maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
