I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
