Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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