I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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