Who did Billy Mays play for?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Randomize
