He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
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