OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
