So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
