yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize