KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
