just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
tonight lets celebrate not being married
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
