Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
