i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
