i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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