Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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