Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
