and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Randomize
