What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
being pregnant is like rehab
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
