It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize