That's intense
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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