It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
