They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
