their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You made out with two different species that night
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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