The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
