Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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