the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
