you mean i was at the winter classic?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
