I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
