The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
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