Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
