didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
