I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize