Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
