More tranny stories later!
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Randomize
