There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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