I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
