Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
