Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
