I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
