i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize