Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
