I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Congratulations! We have a period
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
