I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
