I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
i think i just lost a toe
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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